What is it about me...

What is it about me that REPELS SEXUAL ADVANCES? Why is it that even the most notorious lotharios, sexual harassers of students, swingers, legendary womanisers, polyamorists, all of them decide I need to be treated with respect, and kept at a distance, and not touched or snogged much less anything more, and kept aside for something deeper and more pure. Why, why why? I get an obvious womaniser, multiple serial marrier, person with a complicated love life (that he still hasn't of course mentioned to me), I get him in my house, twice, but all he does is drink water and look at my books and then leave. Why?

Is it that I'm too standoffish? Or that I'm too forward? Too smart- probably? Too obviously in control - I'm not duped at all by the scenario, I see everything but I accept their terms and want to see what I can work out, you know, a casual/secret/ meaningless thing - but they run, they treat me with respect and friendship but I can't even get the other topic on the table. Damn! Why?

It's the same boys who always think I'm really into classical music when they first meet me. Why can't they see the Def Leppard in my soul?

I can handle it, I promise. Even a once off thing and they never call again, it would be fucking better than fucking nothing, which is all I can manage to arrange these days. Argh! Why?